Grumpy Old Man

grumpyWe have a regular customer at my Starbucks that comes in most nights and orders the same drink, ostensibly for his wife.  We’ve named him Grumpy Old Man.  Grumpy Old Man never smiles no matter what we do.  We’ve asked him how he was.  Nothing.  We’ve given him free drinks.  Nothing.  We’ve remembered his drink and had it ready when he walked up.  Nothing.  This man is unbeatable.  But we are determined to get a smile.  So here are the plans we’ve come up with so far…

1. Tell him his nickname is Grumpy Old Man and see if he smiles at it.  After all, most grumpy people want to be recognized for their grumpiness.

2. Tell him that last week, when we did not see him for a few days, we debated whether or not he was dead.  Then tell him we’re glad he’s not dead.  I’d smile at that.

3. Punk him.  Tell him that we are out of green tea (his drink, which we suspect is for his wife…she must be a real gem), then yell “Psych” and pull out his drink.

4. Tell him that we’ll give him his drink if he gives us a smile.  Bonus points for the creepy factor.

So what do you think?  Can we pull it off and actually get him to smile?  Or will he remain relentless in his grumpiness?  Any suggestions as to defrosting his cold demeanor?

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2 thoughts on “Grumpy Old Man

  1. Julia says:

    Regarding #4…there is a partner at my store who often gives customers their total by saying (in a lousy attempt to be charming): “That will be $___ – and a smile.” Although its corny – and yes, a bit creepy – he has a 100% return rate because a). People would probably feel ridiculous if they absolutely refused to smile, and b). There may be a part of them that reacts to this condition with, “Smile, you fool! This is the only way you will get your coffee!”

  2. Rosseroni says:

    Well you don’t want to do anything to startling (as referenced in #3) You don’t want to give him a heart attack. lol

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